I wrote this book in 1985 when my third chakra was opening. When I finished the book and read it, I thought, "This is not very good." So I put it away. Ten years later, to the month, I was rummaging through my bookcase and came upon it.  On a whim, I decided to read it again. "Hey," I said to my self, "this book is good".  

It was, of course, the same book it had been ten years ago. It was me who had changed. Ten years later, when I felt better about myself, I could feel better about my creation. Finally, my old core belief that "I was not creative" had been released and I could enjoy and appreciate my creativity.  

Excerpts From: 

THIRTY VEILS OF ILLUSION
By
Suzan Caroll Ph.D.
 

This manuscript did not begin as a book but as a meditation. At that time, I was a member of a group based in New York, which channeled from the ascended masters who dwell in the higher planes of reality.

These masters have struggled through many earth incarnations, just like we have, and are now free of the cycle of birth and death. However, they have sacrificed their journey into Nirvana to stay within the reach of mankind's consciousness in order to assist our progress into the Light.

The masters offered to open a special inner temple to aid humanity in freeing itself from the illusions of everyday life. I felt a special call within me to experience this privilege. Therefore, each night for thirty consecutive nights, I asked to be taken to this inner temple to have one veil removed each evening.

Each morning, I sat down with pen and paper and asked to be assisted in remembering the previous evening's work. I had been practicing a writing meditation for several years, and I was therefore able to set aside my personality in order to receive an answer.

I lay no claim to the knowledge of cosmic truth. Instead, I present this book in the hope that others may establish a connection with some of the great inner guidance and wisdom that is accessible to all of us. We all have access to inner knowledge if only we quiet ourselves and listen to the small, still voice within.

When I finished each meditation, I found I was a different person. I had kept a pledge I had made to myself to sustain a rhythmic, spiritual practice for an entire month, which greatly increased my self-esteem. Also, I had experienced my inner world in such an intimate way that my perception of the outer world became forever different.

In fact, my outer world became "multidimensional." Never again would I look at the world outside of me without considering the reflection that is cast from my inner world and the impact of the outer world upon my inner nature.

The offer to clear oneself of illusion is always open, and I encourage you to journey deep inside yourselves to experience this unveiling, for:
 

WHEN ILLUSION IS REMOVED, ALL THAT REMAINS IS TRUST.




THE FOREST
 

The moisture seems to come up from the earth. There are no streams or rivers that I can find and there has definitely not been any rain since I have arrived; yet everything has light dew upon it, even when the suns are high overhead.

There is never a total darkness as the three moons are very effective illumination. One of the most unusual things is that I have never seen a shadow. Even when the suns are low on the horizon there are no shadows. Also, the beings of this place do not move. They are in one place and then, suddenly, they are in another place. I wish desperately to have someone to share this with, but then perhaps I would not keep this journal.

First, I suppose I should explain how I came upon this place. I think I can still remember. In this place time is very different. I cannot possibly guess how long I have been here. The suns have crossed the sky twelve times, but I have no idea if this resembles earth time.

On earth, a day consists of the sun rising and setting, moon rising and setting; and then the next sunrise comes, and it is the next day. However, here there seems to be no rhythm to the suns' rising or setting. It almost appears that it is happening for me. If I think that it must be time for the suns to set, then, when I look next, the suns have set.

But, back to how I came here. As far as I can remember I was meditating on the beach near my home on earth. The first time I came here was just for a few moments and then, suddenly; I was back on the beach. I so enjoyed the experience that I tried it again. The second time, I stayed here a little longer. By the third time, I was getting confused as to whether I was there and coming here or here and going there. That was when the shift began. I knew I could change my environment, but I did not know which was real and which was imagined.

Finally, I became very exhausted with the exercise and lay down (somewhere) and went to sleep. When I awoke, I was here. I suppose I could go back to the beach if I wanted to badly enough, but I haven't really tried. I have been so enthralled with the sights and sounds of this new place that I have had no desire, as of yet, to leave.

It seems as if here all polarities have become one. I am desperately lonely, and yet, simultaneously, very content and at peace. I love this place, yet simultaneously, I hate it. The longer I am here the more I am losing the phenomenon of emotion. I am now realizing that a sense of opposition is necessary for the experience of emotion. Also, I have realized that, at least for me, emotion and desire are interwoven.

Perhaps that is why I am still here. I want to be here, but I also don't want to be here. As my emotions are reaching a balance, so are my desires. Therefore, I cannot guess if I will stay or leave this place. With emotion and desire gradually leaving my life, I have no sense of what will replace them. Perhaps, in this place, a replacement is not necessary.

Many things are not necessary here, as there is no separation. As I watch a flower and put my attention upon it, I suddenly become the flower. However, I am still simultaneously myself. Myself? What is that now? Before, myself was what I felt or what I wanted, or what I thought. Now there is little distinction between these three aspects.

As I think, I am, so there is no desire as there is no separation from "wanting" and "having". With no separation there is no possession and, therefore, no possessor and no need to be possessed. On earth there was a strong distinction between thoughts and feelings, but here they are one. On earth I could think about my emotions or think to hide my emotions or I could have an emotion about a thought. Often, if I were very emotional, I would be unable to think at all. Here I am losing that distinction.

Also, I feel I am losing the ability to communicate in this fashion- to separate each thought into a word and put the words in a line. I feel I must write this quickly while I still remember this mode of communication. As I said before, here one communicates by communing.

There is a small flying creature here, but, as I said before, the creatures do not move. Therefore, by flying I mean that the creature lives in the air. If I want to know how it feels to live in the air or speak to this creature, I simply put my attention on to it. Then we are one. It is difficult to explain how this happens. I am still standing on the ground watching the creature, but also I am in the air watching myself. It is somewhat like an earth dream where I am a participant and an observer.

Just as the creatures do not move here, neither do I. I simply am here, and then I am there. But it is different from being "here" or "there" on earth, as there are no real boundaries here. I see a form around me, but I am not limited by it. I suppose I could change forms, but I am still clinging to my earth body.

I am comfortable with it and will need it if I desire to return. "Desire," I'm not sure what that means now. That word has become very abstract and meaningless. Many things that had such meaning on Earth are now unimportant.

Food is not necessary here. Nothing seems to eat, including me. I've experienced no hunger or thirst and have not made or eliminated any waste material. In fact, here there is no waste material. There is no decay. Everything is perfect and beautiful, and then, suddenly, it is gone and replaced by something else.

There are many flowers and trees, but I have not found one dead leaf or flower. The leaves do not fall on the ground but stay on the trees. The flowers do not grow but appear suddenly full and mature. Then, suddenly, they are gone.

There is no need for a home here as I need no shelter or protection. I also do not need a place to sleep, as I do not sleep here. I have not slept yet and feel no fatigue. My energy is constant and balanced. In fact, all is balanced. There is a room for everything, and yet there is infinite space and there is a sense of total intimacy with the world, yet, simultaneously, a sense of complete isolation.

The beings I have met so far are not at all like me. I mean they appear more like animals and plants. I have not yet experienced a being that "feels" like a human. My earth vocabulary is very inept to explain these phenomenons. I don't know what a "human-like" being would be here, yet somehow I know I have not met one.

Perhaps it is time now to meet one. Again the language of earth is incomplete here. I cannot say it is "time" to meet someone. Here, there is no time, and one cannot meet another, as we are all one. As I say these words, I am beginning to experience someone inside me, yet outside of me, that "feels" human. I wish it would take on a body. It is too difficult for me to understand a being without a body.

"Oh, hello, are you a human being?" I ask.

The being laughs. At first I am hurt just for a moment, then the emotion disappears. I can no longer hold on to emotions, they come now more as a memory than as an experience.

"My name, I think, is Jay," I say.

"Here we have no names," it replies, "but we will make one so that you can be more comfortable. How do you feel about Rhea?" it asks telepathically.

"It is nice," I say, still using my voice.

"You know," it says, "here you need not strain your vehicle by producing those sounds. We know what you wish to communicate with us."

"I have so many questions to ask you. Do you mind?"

"Of course not, that is why we are here."

"First," I ask now telepathically, "why do I feel more separation from you than when I commune with the other creatures?"

"Oh, the answer is because you asked for it. When we first communicated with you, we were communing, but you still need the separation."

"That is true," I reply. It felt very unusual when you first came. Why did I not feel the need to be separate from the others, but I do need to feel separate from you?"

"My, my, you do have many questions. You need to learn that here you also have the answers."

This idea is very foreign to me. I mean, on Earth I knew I had an intuition, and I was told I could find my own answers, however, I didn't really believe it. I was constantly reading and studying and finding the answers. Even when I would meditate, or pray, it was to someone else.

I now vaguely remember one meditation I had on another beach where I was told to pray, not to God, but to my Higher Self. But even a Higher Self was separate from my Earth body. As I realized I knew the answers and I forgot all the questions I was going to ask, I merely said, "Would you show me around?"

"Where would you like to go? As you know, there is no movement here, so we can't give you a tour as one would on Earth."

"Well then, perhaps you can show me what people do here."

Again it laughs. "Here we don't do, we are. But we think we know what you mean."

In an instant we are in a huge cave, I can feel the energy of many beings but can only see patterns swirling about the room.

"What are they doing?" I ask.

"They are communing. These beings are learning what you will soon learn."

"What is that?" I ask anxiously pointing to the swirling energy.

"More questions, wait. The answers will become evident as you are ready to experience them."

I look around the cave and see the many different energy forms moving about. I wonder if they have bodies or if that is all there is of them. I feel their humanness although they are not human. There is, however, something about them that make me realize that I am one of them. I ask my guide what I am to do next and it says, "Join them."

"How can I do that, I can barely see them."

"Barely is good enough," it answers. "Just go forward and listen with your heart, they will know you and tell you what to do."

I then walk on or, rather, am drawn to the center of their group. Suddenly I know I am to follow a small light to some destination. As I follow the light I find myself moving, for the first time, down a hall.

The small light gets brighter and brighter as I move. I begin to realize that the light is a Being. As I realize this it moves forward to greet me. I then feel the most euphoric feeling I can ever remember. I am the Being and it is I.

"Come," I hear a voice say within and without of myself. "There is something that you will need to know."

As the light and I move to the end of the hall, we enter a large room filled with many other specks of light. Some of these lights appear to have vague bodies about them and others do not. I now notice that my body is much lighter than before and that it has taken on a translucent quality.

I search within and around me to determine the core of this light being so that I can ask about my body, when I suddenly hear a very loving answer,

"Yes, my dear, your body has changed. It has taken on a very high vibratory rate and, therefore, does not appear as dense as before. Do not worry. Many answers will come if you are willing to listen before you ask. This room," it continues, "is filled with beings like yourself who have come to learn about Truth. The radiant light being who is now speaking is a member of the higher dimensions and is called Lady Leto. Listen now and you shall hear."

I position myself at the back of the room where I can hear a pure luminous inner voice that I somehow know is radiating from the being, Lady Leto. I know that she is speaking to all of us who are gathered here, but, at the same time, she is speaking to each of us in a deeply intimate and personal manner.

"Beloved ones,

"I, Lady Leto, address you with a love that is free of all illusion. I am joyous that you have found your way here to participate in this process of releasing and protecting yourself from illusion. But, before you can do so, you must first understand what illusion is. An illusion is like a cocoon that you create around and within yourself while you are growing your wings and learning how to fly.

"How do you create these illusions? Some illusions were learned from your authority figures when you were a child and others you created yourself from your fear-- fear of the unknown. When you are in a situation that you do not know whether you can face, you create an overlay of that situation of something that you believe is easier to deal with.

This process begins with insecurity in your ability to stand strong in any situation. You then 'desire' the situation to be a certain way, a way in which you feel more comfortable. Then that desire progresses into an 'expectation'. The expectation then directs your 'perception'.

"There are always a myriad of possibilities in any situation and you will perceive those which you desire and expect to experience. If you go for a walk in the woods and you desire and expect to see birds, you will unconsciously search them out and put your attention upon them. If you desire and expect to see litter, you will search it out and see mainly that. The truth is that both the birds and the litter coexist and you choose your reality by your desires, expectations, and consequent perceptions.

"You may ask, 'Why would someone desire to see litter while walking in the woods or desire any negative experience?' The answer is - habit. You have learned to feel safe with what is known and unsafe with what is unknown. If you have grown up with negativity in your environment, you have learned to feel safe in it. It is all you know and therefore you 'expect' negativity because you 'desire' the known rather than the unknown.

"You may believe that illusion is a problem you have in correctly identifying your outer world. This is true, of course, but illusions about the world around you are merely reflections of illusions that you built within yourself from your opinions, fears, insecurities, and attachments. These inner impurities were created by your past environment and project a reality that seems 'as if' it were something else.

“You create this 'as if' reality because it is from your 'known' and therefore feels safer. Then you view life from this apparent reality and make decisions according to that viewpoint and not according to the viewpoint of a peaceful, illumined mind and a loving heart.

“If you can journey inside yourself to address and heal these impurities, you can regain your inherent memory of the Truth. This Truth can provide a safety beyond any illusion, for it is projected from your Higher Self rather than from the fears and traumas of your childhood and ego.

"At Our etheric Focus over Delos, we are working closely with the forces of Truth and Understanding led by Lady Pallas Athena, the Goddess of Truth, Master Hilarion, the Chohan of the Fifth Ray of Truth and Healing and the Great Sun God, Apollo. In actuality, our Council is a Branch of The Lodge of Brothers and Sisters of the Golden Robe. Allow me to explain how we can assist you in understanding how to release and protect yourself from illusion.

"The process of becoming a full God Being involves the subtle lessons of balancing the feminine and masculine nature of God (in breath/ out breath; yin/ yang; assimilation/radiation; love/ power). This balancing of inner (feminine) and outer (masculine) realities can best be achieved when you are able to be conscious of both of these aspects of yourselves.

“Once you have become aware of these portions of yourself, you can then learn to balance them in both your 'waking' (masculine) and 'sleeping' (feminine) life. The more conscious you become of learning these lessons of balance of personal energy, the sooner will your Spiritual Selves be able to master the Mind. This learning of balance flourishes all the more when enough purification of the inner nature has occurred to remove learned and self-created illusion.

"Two important gifts have been granted to mankind to speed this evolutionary process. The first is the conscious connection of mankind to the Ascended Masters, such as us. These Masters have trod the path of evolution through many Earth embodiments, and are therefore able to understand and assist each of you in your inner journey to Mastery.

"The second gift is that of the Violet Fire of Transmutation. This Violet Fire is an inner activity that is available to any direct call. The Violet Fire is a Spiritual Force of very high vibration. All imperfection that is absorbed within this light shall be released to the Original Source to be purified and later redistributed into the Universe. All that survives the Violet Fire is assured to be of only the highest vibratory rate and is therefore, Divine Truth and Perfection. With this 'tool' of transmutation, you can quickly separate truth from illusion. You may summon the use of this Fire by the affirmation:

BLAZE, BLAZE, BLAZE
THE VIOLET FIRE
TRANSMUTING
ALL SHADOW
INTO
LIGHT, LIGHT, LIGHT

"The Sisters and Brothers of Delos will assist you in the process of balancing your inner and outer lives by removing one veil of illusion from your inner consciousness for thirty consecutive days. With the removal of each veil they will gently reveal to you the Truth and Understanding of each of these illusions.

Think of it, thirty veils of illusion lifted from your inner nature to clear your spiritual awareness, a major lesson each day. On the thirty-first day, we shall present ourselves at the Elemental Harvest Celebration, where the elements that make up your own inner vehicle may present their gifts of heightened progress and purity to the Lord of the World.

"Each day, this ceremony of purification will begin by your being led into a Circle of White Light where two Sisters from my focus of Truth, almost formless in their pink radiance, will help you to release each 'veil' from your inner world.

“Then two Brothers outside of the Circle will further assist you. The Brother from Hilarion's focus shall project the Truth concerning each 'veil' that is necessary for your.

“Then the Brother from Apollo's focus shall assist you in manifesting the power of Understanding of this Truth in your outer mind. I will further aid you in remembering this inner ceremony in your outer consciousness. Pay attention to the lessons learned this month. Use the Violet Fire to set free all shadow so that nothing can distract you from this service to your life.

"Enfolding you like a mother protecting her child from danger, I shall stand guard over your Spiritual development so that you can feel safe. I shall not rest until each of you are free in the Reality of eternal Peace within the 'I AM Consciousness'."

When the great Lady finishes her inspirational speech, I feel a ripple of love and unity throughout the group. I search again for my guide to ask what I am to do when I hear a voice from within.

"Yes, my dear, you have been invited to partake in this ceremony. However, you must be willing to return to Earth between each lesson so that you can ground it in your physical garment and your physical life. Are you willing to do so?"

"Well," I say slowly, "I can't say I'm anxious to return to that land of boxes, but I do feel very inspired by the words of Lady Leto. I suppose if I can learn to truly understand what she said, my life there will be much happier."

"Is that a yes, my one?"

"Yes," I say, "that is a yes. And I hope I am not sorry."

"Remember, my dear," she kindly replies "that any effort put into the advancement of your Soul shall be forever a portion of your Being. When you go to sleep each night, call to us and we shall see that you return here."

"Must I leave now?" I ask. But, even as I speak, I feel the room fading about me as I begin to feel heavier and heavier.

VEIL ONE "The Illusion of Time is Money"

"Oh my, I am back." As I was leaving I was afraid I would not return, but I'm here now. However, I don't know where I was before. I know my guide said I was to return to Earth, but I don't remember anything else.

"Hello, my one." I hear the familiar voice of my guide.

"I know that many do not use names here." I say, "But, if I had a name to call you, it would help me."

"Why, of course. You may call me Lady Astrea. I have been assigned to answer your call and I will remain as your guide as long as you need me," she answers. (I had always felt her as very feminine, but it is difficult to determine one's polarity and sex without a visible body.)

"It is your turn to enter the Circle now. Please, follow me," she asks, as if I could deny her request. Since she is within me as much as outside of me, I don't know how I could resist following her even if I wanted to. We move through another hallway and I feel my body, what there is of it, grow lighter, and lighter as we move towards a golden door at the end of the hall.

"In the future you shall arrive at the other side of the door. But, for the first time, you will need to arrive here so that you can adjust yourself gradually to this higher vibration. Take a slow, deep breath now and prepare yourself before the door opens, for on the other side the vibration is very high."

I do as she says, and as the door opens, I feel as if a huge fire is beginning to flame before me. I shield my eyes and cling to the walls of the hall. Because I am losing all sense of direction, I no longer know what is up or down or if I am standing, sitting or lying down. For the first time in this place, I feel discomfort.

I experience an intense buzzing in my ears and a profound sense of dizziness and nausea. I can see nothing and can hear only the buzzing. I feel as if I am on fire from within. I am frozen to the spot at the same time that I feel like I am moving at the speed of light. I can't think, or talk, or even feel. Why am I here? What have I committed myself to? Surely this is death!

"No, my love, you will not die. Only the parts of you that are unwilling to change will die because here a commitment made is a commitment lived. Any portion of you that is unable to continue will mercifully be released. Do not resist this process. Instead hold on to that which remains and trust. Most of all, my one, trust."

At first I am surprised that I can hear her words over the intense buzzing, but as I listen it gives me something to hold on to and I begin to find a comfort in this new way of being. However, I still cannot speak and would not know what to say if I could. Therefore, I am blindly following her, still being able to see very little in this brilliant light. Into the center of the room we move, where the light is even stronger, and there appears to be a circle formed of this light. I follow my guide, hearing dimly over the eternal buzzing, "Trust, above all, you must Trust."

As I step into the circle, I find I am alone-totally and completely alone. However, this aloneness does not cause the old familiar fear, but rather commands a deep and complete stillness. Stillness beyond anything I can ever remember experiencing. Suddenly, two beautiful Ladies dressed in a pink radiance appear from somewhere within the circle and move towards me. They gently remove an unseen veil from my face.

They move to the periphery of the circle and I hear the voice of Lady Leto saying, "Beloved, the first veil is the illusion of 'Time is Money'. Time and money are both only important on the third dimensional Earth and are therefore great foundations for illusion. Neither has any value to your inner world. The formula for this illusion is based on the belief that: one must have money to survive-it takes time to make money-therefore, only so much time can be expended on inner work as time must be spent on making money for survival."

The brother from Hilarion's temple then takes the veil and as he does so I hear a familiar voice saying, "The truth, of course, my one, is that time, as you know it on Earth, exists only on the third dimension. This is true as well for money. Time is an alignment of thoughts and actions, which is necessary to motivate one while on Earth. In effect, time is a mode of transportation whereby one can move throughout one's Earth classes. Money is a barter of exchange, which has come to represent value and, therefore, success on Earth.

"In the Oneness of the fifth dimension, no exchange or reward is necessary because all live in Unity. We do not experience the feeling of separation that is so pronounced on Earth and, therefore, we have no need to form these symbols of exchange and reward. When there is unity of heart and mind, there is no greater reward, and nothing is requested in exchange for Unconditional Love."

"Please," I add quickly, suddenly finding my voice, "may I ask why it is that your voice feels so familiar to me?"

"Why yes," comes the answer, "I am Hilarion and I have spoken with you many times in answer to your inner call. I am pleased you have come to the ceremony and I will gladly answer any questions which you have."

Hilarion then gives the veil of illusion to the brother from the Retreat of Mighty Apollo who releases this veil back to the first cause to be transmuted into pure Light.

"Allow me to introduce you to Apollo himself," says Hilarion. "He will assist you in understanding each veil of Illusion as it is removed."

"Good morning, one, I am glad to make your acquaintance. Our energies have not connected before today. I am glad you have called upon the Understanding of the One. 'Time is Money', is a lovely Earth illusion, one which is especially prevalent in the western world.

“It is also an illusion that is particular to the third dimension. Upon the fourth dimension, there is still time but it is different than on the third dimension. What could be years upon the physical plane could be minutes upon the astral plane. The astral plane is another name for the fourth dimension, just as the physical plane is another name for the third dimension.

"Within the time era in which your physical form lives, there is a wonderful moment of transition. The third dimension is collapsing into the fourth dimension. Think now of a collapsible travel cup with the smallest portion of the cup at the bottom. Therefore, the bottom of the cup collapses into the portion of the cup just above it, which is a bit larger. Much like the travel cup, the third dimension will collapse into the fourth dimension. Nothing will cease to exist. However, a new vibration will surround the third dimension.

"Within the reality of the third dimension, time is money for the reasons stated above. However, in the fourth dimension, passage of time is dependent upon one's activity. Time is most enjoyable and passes most rapidly and easily when one is enjoying an artistic endeavor.

“Therefore, upon the fourth dimension, 'time is art'. Allow yourself to feel the enjoyment of artistic activity in whatever form you wish. Remember, no matter how much money one has, one cannot buy time. Therefore, spend your time wisely and with joy."

As the scene dims before me, I realize I am returning to Earth. The last words I remember before losing consciousness are something about not having time for myself, as I put so much of my attention on other peoples' lives instead of my own...

VEIL TWO "The Illusion of Sorrow"

This time the dizziness and buzzing are a little easier to bear. However, it seems to take forever before I can accustom to this intense light. Gradually, I can see the circle before me and I can feel Lady Astrea gently reminding me that it is my time to enter the circle.

Again, the Ladies come to me and remove an unseen veil and, as they do so, I hear the voice of Lady Leto from within saying, "This veil is the "Illusion of Sorrow'. As you may recall from your life challenges, the theme is again and again the loss of love and the resulting sorrow. Know my one that love can never die. It may change or move to a higher vibration, but it cannot die. Once the energy of love has been formed on earth, the creator of that energy has made a lifelong friend. For, to be creators of love is the major earth lesson for all of mankind."

As the Brothers of Hilarion's retreat take the veil, I hear Hilarion's voice saying, "The energy field of Love acts energetically as a shield. When you become a master of energy, you will be able to see Love energy in any environment. Love energy is different from all other energy fields. Other energies leave the aura of the creator and begin their traverse throughout the realities, which is eventually terminated in their three-fold return to the creator.

“Love energy, of course, also leaves the creator, but it leaves a small portion of itself with the creator as a shield of protection. This is because Love is very attractive and adhesive. It clings to all that it comes in contact with. Love is the most powerful energy force known on the planet earth, with Divine Love being the highest."

I then hear the voice of Apollo, "Dear one, good morning again. How you have suffered in this life! How you have felt unloved and unlovable! The sorrow that has come to you from the illusion of loss of Love has been your most difficult life lesson. As you know from your individual karma in other lives, you have tended not to value your loved ones and have instead focused your energies elsewhere. Because of that pattern you have 'feared' your karmic retribution of loss of Love and, my dear one, as you know, 'Fear Precipitates'.

"Know now in your heart of hearts that love can never die. Love always remains with the Soul of the lover and the loved ones. Love is a Soul quality and, therefore, rises eventually to the level of Soul. Even if the being is to die, it does not matter because the Love shall automatically be passed up to the one's higher body. Remember that there is no true sorrow, as there is no true separation. Separation is the ultimate illusion, particular to the planet Earth. On the Sun, we are all one.

"Remember now that your feelings of sorrow are truly loneliness for Home. This loneliness for Home is a Divine Discontent. Allow Divine Discontent to guide you into your spiritual heart. Use this illusion. Feel the sorrow and carry it to your Heart. Set it at the feet of the Oneness where your Soul will mop your brow and touch your heart. The One awaits your gift. The giving is your treasure."

With Apollo's mighty words I feel myself fading and know that I am now returning to earth...

VEIL THREE "The Illusion of Hard Work"

As I awaken, I find myself inside the golden room with the door open behind me. Actually, I suppose I have fallen asleep, but since I do not remember Earth while I am here, it feels more like I am awakening when I return. I wonder if I remember any of this when I am awake on Earth. I have no way of knowing, as I cannot remember anything other than what is happening to me while I am here.

I will have to ask Lady Astrea about that sometime, but now I feel it is my turn to enter the Circle. Each time it becomes easier for me to bear the increased vibration. I wonder if this activity changes my earth body as much as it changes this one.

Again, the Ladies come to remove yet another Veil as I hear the voice of Lady Leto saying, "The Veil we lift now is the 'Illusion of Hard Work'. Work is another aspect that is particular to Earth existence. 'Work' is an activity that became necessary to man only after he had fallen from grace. This fact is because Work, by definition, is based on resistance. Therefore, it was an unknown concept when man was living in his Divine Plan free of all resistance."

As the Ladies carry the veil to the Brothers, I hear the voice of Master Hilarion, "The energy field of work is something to behold. If mankind could see this energy, it is doubtful that they would ever indulge in the activity. Many molecules are moving towards each other in dissonant patterns. It is no wonder that mankind often experiences fatigue.

“In fact, the basis of human 'aging' is the concept and activity of Work. Whenever one indulges in a given energy field, their personal energy field becomes aligned with it. Therefore, they move into a vortex of energy in which many molecules are colliding with each other. Each individual molecule tries to either hold its position or infringe on another's position. This constant energy battle dissipates one's vital forces. As one's vital forces are dissipated, his/her physical body is robbed of vital healing nutrients.

“Therefore, for these minutes or seconds that the physical body is denied its life force, it begins to 'die'. Then, the worker will cease the work and begin to rest. At this time the body can be healed and replenished. However, some cells are irretrievably damaged and, hence, the body dies bit by bit.

"Yoga is a very important discipline for one to follow as it floods the body with many life giving nutrients and moves these nutrients systematically throughout the body. In the ascended state, all movement is like that of a great yoga master. There is no physical illusion of separation and, therefore, each movement, thought, and feeling is a flow of Divine Force channeling throughout one's individuality."

As the other Brothers take the veil, I hear Apollo say: "Throughout the centuries, 'Work' and 'bravery' have been associated. I am particularly familiar with this Earth connection, as many warriors have called to me for bravery throughout the ages. Work and bravery are connected because bravery in its ultimate is to face death and as Mighty Hilarion has spoken Work is indeed a slow form of death.

“However, on the cusp of one's ascension, one begins to associate death with birth and birth with death. When this association happens, bravery also takes on a new meaning. Bravery then comes to represent courage, not in facing death, but instead, courage in facing Life.

"Indeed, much bravery is necessary to live victoriously in your land of illusion. Therefore, my one, continue with your journey into a new state of awareness. Call on me for bravery to face Illusion, call on all your forces, and feel them coursing throughout your physical body. Eventually the Illusion of Work will fade and be replaced by the truth of living the Divine Work, free of resistance, and in ultimate freedom, you may then live the creation of the New World. Welcome!"

Again, the dimming and fading is experienced. This fading is not only of what I see but also of who I am. If only I could know that I am remembering and using this information on Earth. Perhaps this experience is all for nothing. Perhaps I go back to Earth and do, think, and feel exactly as always. If only I could remember and use what I learn here. Oh, I am leaving. I feel like I am dying...

VEIL FOUR "The Illusion of Question"

Where am I? Oh yes, I am here. I see the door behind me and I see Lady Astrea to my right. Perhaps I can ask her now about why I don't remember my Earth life while I am here.

But, before I can formulate the question, I hear her saying, "Dear, you will know when you remember this experience on Earth when you can remember your Earth life while you are here. Be patient with yourself. It is very difficult to live two realities at once, and your High Self will determine when you are ready."

High Self? What is she talking about? Does she mean that there is even more of me than my waking and sleeping self? I am even more confused now than I was before I asked the question, but now I must enter the Circle. I hope I can remember to ask her about that "High Self".

I am entering the Circle and, as I do so, I feel like I am coming Home. The two dear Ladies appear as if from nowhere and lovingly release another veil and I hear the voice of Lady Leto. It appears that she, too, heard my question as she says, "Last evening the work was very deep and you were unable to carry any of it to your outside mind. Know that seeing the connection between the inside and the outside is sometimes dependent on your fortitude. In this case, it was better not to remember the night's work so that you could rest.

This evening the Ladies have lifted the "Illusion of Question'. To question is to feel the separation between yourself and the ultimate source. To question is to put one's consciousness into human consciousness to ask of a higher or another source. On this side of the veil, we are living in a constant state of knowing.

All divine information is so readily within our grasp that we can easily attune to whatever is appropriate. Also, on the spirit level, we are not obligated to attune to only one thing. I can personally attend to you while I just as personally attend to all others who are also calling me this day."

As the veil is given to the brother, Hilarion speaks, "I can see, my One, that you are 'questioning' this concept. This, of course, is part of the reason why you were unable to bring forward any of the work of last evening. I will try to explain this to you.

“To you particularly, questioning has been an important part of your growth. Questioning is a lot like wanting. Wanting denotes that you do not already have and, this wanting pulls one out of the cosmic flow of All in All. Questioning acts in much the same manner. When you question, there is an underlying energy field that denotes that you do not already know. This separates you from the Universal Mind.

"To release the Illusion of Questioning, one would instead Unify. When you Unify with the Universal Mind, no questioning is necessary as your mind is united with the Universal Mind. Then, the information desired can be collected just as it is "collected" from your physical brain. Dear one, try not to question this concept, but rather take a moment to experience the difference. First, ask yourself a question, then Unify. As you have seen, to question dissects your consciousness into individual words and concepts. To Unify, however, opens you to all answers simultaneously."

As the other Brothers take the veil, Apollo speaks, "The opposite polarity of questioning is understanding, because you do not have to question if you have grasped what was said. We have unified with your consciousness and, therefore, know exactly what you need us to say to you to further your Understanding.

“The basis of questioning is insecurity and impatience. Insecurity comes from the illusion of space because one is insecure in one's supposed separation from All That IS. Impatience comes from the illusion of time. Therefore, space and time are interrelated in questioning. As you transcend both space and time, the illusion of separation (space) and the human quality of impatience (time) are also transcended."

With mighty Apollo's final words I instead feel the "pull" back into space and time. No, no, I don't wish to re-enter yet. I have more questions...